HOW TO TAKE THE HIGH ROAD, DISARM TROLLS, AND SAVE DEMOCRACY (Part 2)
We hold these truths to be self-evident…
Americans love freedom. Revere it as a national religion. And our most revered freedom of all, by far, is freedom of speech. According to a recent survey, 47% of those polled said freedom of speech is the single most important right, almost five times the number citing the second-choice, freedom of religion.
Freedom of speech was included in the First Amendment for a reason — debating points of public policy, exposing corruption, and creating a national consensus requires the open expression of different opinions.
But when it comes to the internet, the forums where freedom of speech are most often expressed seem to have become polluted.
Polluted with trolls.
According to a survey cited in a recent Time magazine article, 70% of 18-to-24-year-olds who use the Internet have experienced harassment, and 26% of women that age said they’ve been stalked online.
How can the forums necessary to live in a functioning democracy exist when so many voices are poisoning those forums with insults and threats?
And, how do we take those spaces back?
Anti-troll insurgency
I am writing this series of blog articles to collaboratively develop strategies to take the internet public spaces back. To take them back not by counter-arguing, counter-bullying, or counter-insulting, but by creating a healthy community who talk back from a place of emotional health and calm, clear reasoning, and determination.
I’m convinced this approach is the only approach that can win.
I call this community “the High Roaders.”
I’ve devoted much of my life’s work to the study of communication. Beyond being a college professor in communication, I’ve led programs helping all types of people who act like trolls… only they act out that way in person. To your face.
I’ve managed programs helping addicts, ex-offenders, the homeless, and the mentally ill to move forward in life. It is from this counseling background, in particular, that I’ve adopted the approaches I’m convinced can, and will, work.
And, work not by surrendering but by understanding what winning means.
Begin with the end in mind
In my first blog, I suggested a mindset critical to engaging in a healthy, empowered way when confronted with unhealthy, obnoxious behavior. This mindset has two tools:
- Commit, right now, to never getting angry over any comment posted on the internet, ever.
- Never lose sight of the fact that we could be the ones who are wrong
These tools are necessary. If we are to be part of the solution, we can’t, ourselves, act in a way that contributes to the problem. We need to be like doctors of the internet – “first, do no harm.” J We do not defeat trollism in America by becoming trolls ourselves.
To go forward in developing response strategies, we need to follow one of Steven Covey’s 7 habits, “Begin with the end in mind”. When we post comments on line, what do we actually hope to accomplish?
This requires more thought than you might at first think. “To express my opinion” might be your first thought. Okay. And, then what? What specific difference do you want the expressing of your opinion to make? And to whom?
Or, “to make my point”, “to persuade others” – none of these outcomes are defined specifically enough to guide us in our methods.
When we post a comment on line, what difference do we want it to make? To whom? And toward what outcome?
If our focus is on posting comments that just make us feel good by slamming those who disagree with us, what are we actually accomplishing? Other than the short-term feeling of shallow satisfaction (“ha! Got him good with that one!”), how is that helping anyone or anything? The one outcome we are surely not accomplishing is changing anyone else’s heart or mind about anything… other than making the case to the very people we should be trying to persuade that we’re a jerk.
What is persuasion good for anyway?
Let’s look at what outcomes are realistic whenever we try to persuade anyone of anything.
Below is a standard Likert scale:
All of us fall somewhere on this scale on every issue. When we seek to persuade someone, I’ve long felt that we believe we can somehow come up with some comment, some point, some withering attack that will completely change another person’s opinion 180 degrees – to persuade someone who strongly disagrees with us to, instead, strongly agree with us.
That almost never happens.
On the planet we live on, the human beings inhabiting it are very reluctant to change their opinions. About anything. Regardless of what evidence we bring forward. So, what is persuasion good for, and what can we actually hope to accomplish by making persuasive arguments in the first place?
What is realistic is moving people one square. That’s it. One square. To take someone who is undecided and have them slightly agree or disagree. To take someone who disagrees strongly and have them disagree less strongly. All along the scale. One square. This is what is realistically achievable, and as I am reluctant to attempt the impossible, this is a focus for our proposed interactions, not just on-line, but in life.
To seek to move people’s hearts and minds one square at a time.
Troll Triage
For our purposes, let’s divide up everyone who posts comments on line into four major groups:
- 1) People who already agree with us
2) People who disagree with us and aren’t trolls
3) People who act like trolls but believe they are reasonable
4)Malicious trolls intent on poisoning the well
As this series of blogs unfold, I’m going to be developing specific response strategies for each group. In wrapping up this week’s lengthy post, I just want to touch briefly on what I consider the low-hanging fruit – group 3, people who act like trolls but believe they are reasonable.
My inspiration for this entire blog series has been the revelation that there are those who act like trolls, but either don’t intend to or believe that’s just the way the “game is played.” Time and time again, I’ll confront this group, not with counter-insult, but instead by pointing out how their poor behavior reflects badly on their cause. This sometimes required initially ignoring relatively minor slights and responding clearly with appropriate methods of expressing disagreements.
And voila!
Group 3 “trolls” sometimes – sometimes – begin to respond more reasonably. I can see them feeling less certain of the rightness of their point of view. No, they don’t agree with me, but I achieve the achievable.
I move them one square.
Moreover, I modify their behaviors by rewarding the behaviors I want. Respond reasonably, and get rewarded with respectful attention. Act badly, become ignored and irrelevant. I’ll be developing more specific strategies for dealing with group 3 trolls, based upon real-world examples, next blog.
I’ll also be developing response strategies for the other 3 groups moving forward, as well. Along the way, I hope others will participate in the creation of a High Road battle plan that can win back our internet public places.
At least some of them. Some of the time.
Is this where we sing Kumbaya?
This won’t be easy. I’m under no illusions that, so long as “we’re cool”, we will encounter nothing but peaceful, cool responses in return. I’m well aware that the very hallmarks of healthy interaction are, in some troll mindsets, evidence of weakness.
I’m not suggesting disarmament in the war against trolls. If I sometimes choose to turn the other cheek it is not out of weakness nor a lack of ability to strike back. No, I am quite capable of insulting people. I’m actually very good at it. Part of me likes to insult people (don’t tell anyone). Just love those “I believe you mean ‘you’re’, ‘it’s’, and ‘their’, idjit!”
But, you know what…
…we do not persuade people by insulting them.
If I sometimes choose to turn the other cheek it is to show that I can take your best shot and you can’t hurt me. In that light, while I reserve the right to return fire, I turn the other cheek as the ultimate power move. (see tool #1)
Where’s this going?
I have a vision. A vision of countless healthy, reasonable people holding differing viewpoints on every issue, disagreeing like adults. Pointedly, clearly, even loudly, but still productively, healthily, respectfully.
Like the Americans we see ourselves as being.
I hope to eventually organize strike forces of people to take over internet spaces with reasonable, healthy discussion – to overwhelm the trolls with our number, by rewarding good behavior and punishing bad behavior, not by feeding the trolls with insults, but by ignoring them.
One forum at a time. Supporting others who act appropriately, most particularly those we disagree with.
I hope to eventually create physical MeetUp groups where we get together as High Road gangs to take back our neighborhood from the trolls. I hope to maybe live stream these meetings – to be as transparent as possible in our methods, means, and objectives.
I hope I’m on the right track or can at least find it. I hope that others will provide feedback to keep me from getting too far off track along the way!
Next week, we lay out some tools for group number 3.
Stay tuned!
And, please, please, please – by all means – disagree! J